Parenting books have always seemed a bit, ummm, gimicky to me. I have a hard time believing that a self-proclaimed expert who has never met my children could know how to parent them better than me.But if being the mother of three children has taught me anything, it's that I often have no clue what I'm doing. At least it feels that way.
The honest truth is that I've discovered that some fresh ideas or a new point of view can work wonders for my parenting dilemmas. The trick for me has been to find new ideas that jive with my desire for gentle and respectful parenting.
So, in desperate frustration over Jack's sleep issues, I turned to Elizabeth Pantley's No-Cry Sleep Solution. And let me tell you up front: this book did. not. disappoint.
Jack is an unbelievably good-natured and happy baby. So I've been feeling like a complete idiot for the fact that it was taking us a good two hours to get him to sleep at night, or that it took 45 minutes to get him down for naps that only lasted 30 minutes, or that he'd start crying the minute we pulled down the blinds in his bedroom.
That was last week. This morning, when it was time for his nap, I sang him a song, laid him down in his crib wide awake and smiling and walked out of the room. He cooed to himself for about 5 minutes and then he slept for TWO HOURS! If those aren't dramatic results, I don't know what are.
6 comments:
so you're saying I have to read the book to learn the solution? or were you going to pass along what did the trick? I guess I'll have to read the book.
The book outlines a whole bunch of different ideas to help babies sleep-- very realistic since there are a wide variety of babies. Which is why I think you should read the book instead of just going off of our solution.
Our problem was that Jack associated sleep with one of two things: #1- nursing, #2- being held. Our solution was to (gently) change his sleep association. We created a short new bedtime routine that included nursing at the very beginning, instead of the end. Our new routine is: nursing, diaper change or bath, cuddles and a song, and then down to bed.
When we first started this, he'd start to fuss when I put him in the crib. I immediately picked him up and calmed him and then put him back in the crib. I repeated this as long as it took to get him to stay in the crib happily. The first night I probably picked him up and put him down 20 times. The next night it was less, and so on and so forth. Now we do the routine once, lay him down, and he's good to go (to sleep).
I suppose it's all pretty common sense stuff, but when you're a bit sleep deprived and crazy, every little bit of help counts.
hmm,.. i'll have to look into the book.
Glad you're getting more sleep. Thanks for posting an explanation about what you did.
So glad it worked out for you. Hazel had massive sleep issues and I bought and read this book, but it wasn't helpful to me (with this child). Yet more evidence that every child is unique and you just have to try, try, try everything until you find what works for them.
And I must add my opinion that you really are a very gentle and respectful parent.
Maybe I need to read that book again. I read it right after J was born, but I was actually reading it more with S in mind, as she never was keen on going to sleep.
Little M sleeps pretty well, but I have no IDEA how to get her to go to sleep without nursing. She thinks its her magic sleeping potion, and believes she absolutely cannot achieve sleep without it. I've tried what you did, but maybe just not long enough. After 6 or so tries and an extremely irritated baby and tired mama, I just reattach her and give up! I can mostly sleep while she nurses, and she does eventually quit and she'll sleep the rest of the night (anywhere from 6-10 hours) next to me (but unattached), so I guess I haven't gotten desperate enough yet. ;) So glad you've found a solution though. I wish I owned that book.
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